This is me right now. It's barely past noon and I'm feeling all confused in my head. When we saw our RE's partner on Friday, we discussed the HSG, because I asked about it. (They don't do an HSG per se, but rather a colour doppler, saline u/s or something - like I said, she rushed and didn't give me much time to write things down or clarify things). She gave me a laundry list of reasons we don't need to do it right now - all of my other tests (lots of b/w and a few u/s) came back good, she asked about pelvic or bowel surgery in my history, STIs, etc. I have none of those so she said there really aren't any risk factors so they absolutely don't think it's necessary right now. She said if we do Femara and TI for a couple of cycles (2-3) with no luck, then they'd look at doing it. In talking about it with other ladies who are far more knowledgeable than I about this stuff, it's sounding like I need to call and insist on having it done. This pisses me off on a few levels. It makes me question the clinic (which I've liked up until now, it's close by and my GP really recommended Dr. R), it makes me feel like the plan still needs to be altered, and it annoys me that I asked point blank about the test twice and then she still somehow managed to convince me, for a time, that we can proceed as planned. I'm going to call on my lunch and ask some questions, see what Dr. R has to say and hopefully get this booked. I have no idea what this all might cost, but I'm more afraid of the potential cost of me not insisting.
To make matters worse, I can't get into this in much detail right now, but my parents are not in a good place, haven't been for a while, and I'm worried they may be calling it quits. I'm 29, I know there are lots of divorced people out there, but this breaks my heart. I'm kind of on my mom's side in that I don't think she's being unreasonable at all, she's the one still willing to work on this, my dad doesn't seem to want to put in any effort. I am so close to both of my parents, H & I are there every Sunday for dinner, we all get along super well. I don't want to get into this any more, I just can't right now, but needless to say, it's helping with the jumble of crap that's running through my head. Is it Friday yet??
I'm so sorry you are feeling like this. That road sign pic along with a "jumbled head" is exactly how I've felt lately so I completely understand. I hate that you're in the same place :-( I hope things will feel better soon.
ReplyDeleteI do agree that the HSG/thing is very important and I thought Shel brought up a good point in that it could be even MORE important with undiagnosed IF. I've had to disagree with my RE twice when I did not feel good about the path they wanted to take (unmonitored Clomid and then IVF before I was ready) and it is HARD. It is hard to advocate for yourself when they are the professionals and you feel like you should trust them. I also worried about them thinking I was some sort of "problem" patient. I got over it though and both times, have been very glad I advocated for myself and haven't felt like they treated me or thought of me any differently. Don't forget that you are the one who will have to live with the unsettled feelings/worry every day if you don't feel right about your plan, not them. It's important to feel comfortable with how you move forward. I really hope your lunchtime call went well if it happened.
Also, I am sorry to hear about your parents. I'm sure that situation is not helping your emotions and stress level right now. Sending you a big squishy (((HUG))) J!
Oh J, I'm so sorry about the situation with your parents and I'm sorry that you have all of these IF worries on top of it. I hope that you were able to talk to your doctor and he was able to ease some of those concerns, at least a little bit. ::HUGS::
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