The cycle that will not end...

CD39/14DPO, according to my second O date.  I thought I was 11DPO when they told me I hadn't actually O'd, so just as I thought the 2ww was wrapping up, it was actually starting all over again.  Awesome.  This is also the second longest cycle I've ever had.  So.Much.Waiting.  I spent the second 2ww being fuming mad at my clinic for mis-confirming O, then super sad about a wasted cycle, and then I got myself focused on the cycle ahead.  I started spotting yesterday and totally expected it to turn into CD1.  Nope.  Woke up early this morning, totally expecting AF - nope.  By mid morning, I was confused.  I know your LP can vary by a day or so and it's really no big deal.  But it's only been recently that I've even started getting to 12-13DPO at all.  My LP used to be more like 10-11 days.  After talking to a few friends, and even though I was spotting this morning, I took a test.  BFN - obviously.  Why did I, even for a moment, think there might actually be a second line there?  Stupid, stupid, stupid.  It's now mid afternoon, no AF, just an annoyed me.  Honestly, I haven't wished for AF in 17 months, but mentally, I'm over this cycle and have started to think positively about the next cycle and moving forward, which we can do as soon as AF arrives...any time now.